FIRST NEW POEM IN A LONG WHILE

I do not know why the only time I feel inspired to write poetry is when my heart is broken, or when my life is in turmoil. Perhaps it is simply because it is during these times that I feel things most intensely, and perhaps I have no other outlet. I have a blog in the draft stage that is no where near ready to post, but this poem came from my broken heart this morning. It is written about my ex girlfriend/ex lover/ex friend Corrie. I did not choose for it to be over, I did not want it to end. But a lot of things have been going wrong for a long time, and yesterday she erased me from her life. Her friends erased me from theirs as well it appears. None of them read this, and it would not matter if they did. There is always one person left behind when a relationship ends. She was looking for a new relationship the whole time we were together, so I really am the fool here. But, broken hearts and promises. I still love her, and am in the grieving stage. So... as follows... my poem. Thanks for reading.

Brown Glass Eyes

(for Corrie)

As I look into my heart
Shattered beyond repair
To the place you used to occupy
Unable to find you there

I think about the love we had
The tears and laughter shared
The joy of your touch, the softness of your skin
In precious moments paired

I think of the flecks of gold and green
cast by God Himself in perfect array
The most beautiful eyes I have ever seen
Closed forever to me this day

I think of the succulent taste of your lips
As they caress mine with tender kisses
I think with fondness of your hand in mine
And of the love my heart now misses.

An empty void in my heart
A hole inside my head
I did not want us to part
And I wish that I were dead.

You seemed to be the perfect one
Imperfect just like me
Happily I lived with you and your son
And prayed for our life to be

But now you have erased me from your life
And burned me from your heart
The dreams that you would be my wife
You methodically tore apart.

Your friends I see have erased me too
I must admit that really hurt me bad
I guess I had hoped for more from you
So I am more than a little sad.

From Zero Attraction
and fear of being hurt
My heart is in traction
Ground into the dirt

But the communication failed, the trust was broken
I thought that you loved me, I thought your love was true
But over time the untruths that were spoken
In your search to find someone new

You never gave me a chance to validate your heart
You felt unworthy of the love I gave
You were bent on destruction from the start
Now there is precious little to save

After all the trials that we faced,
After all that we had been through
From the day we first embraced
I fell in love with you.

I thought that we shared a love
Two lives once broken, joined and made anew
A gift to us from God above
I thought we shared a love, but turns out only I loved you.