This month has been mostly crappy. I have been in the hospital most of it. I guess I have made my medical spend down, and then some. First MRSA infection in my leg... okay.. I was wrong. Technically it was MSSA, the same bug, but not resistant to antibiotics. But who the hell has heard of MSSA? Why cant they just say staph? Oh well. Then comes a bout of pancreatitis, gastritis, and now it looks like the infection in my leg is coming back in spite of the antibiotics. For the past 10 days I have been unable to eat without pain, everything I eat and drink causes me pain. As a result I am afraid to eat. As a result of all the hospitalization and my fear of eating, I have lost 31 pounds. The loss of that much weight in 3 weeks time scares the shit out of me, but otherwise, I am pretty cool with it. I wanted to lose weight, just not this way. I was in the emergency room again last night over in Oregon at the Adventist Health Center. They were nice, but could not really help me. It was the pain that took me there. I am so sick of hurting all the time. I want to eat, I need to eat, but with it hurting, What the hell am I supposed to do? Sometimes I get so sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time that I feel like giving up on life altogether. Then as it happens every time, I get over it.
Ain't life a bitch?
